I know that sometimes I need to talk about what
God is doing in my life today. But sometimes it is
good to look back and see the miracles God performed.
I know that November of 2001 God was doing huge things
in our life to prepare us for the even bigger things He would
be doing in us and for us in the next 9 years. He needed to
in my own life to tear down my faulty foundation stones,
so He could build in me a firm foundation to withstand
the following years.
In 1996 my grandparents died and left us the land that I am now living on.
The land was in my name and I really wished it would go away. I did
not want it nor did I want to live on it. On the other hand,
my husband and my kids thought is was heaven. I often think
I was like Lisa Douglas in Green Acres. I really did not want to move to the
country. My husband got house plans, I wasn't interested. I made my heart
hard. He would come out here and walk the place,
telling me of all of the dreams that he had. I remained unmoved. I dug
my feet in harder.
But I kept praying that God would do something to change my husbands heart.
You know how when you pray that prayer the only person who's heart gets changed
is me. Then I did a Gideon s fleece. I went to the store one morning and I got a book
of house plans. I spent the whole day going over plan by plan. When he came home that
evening I said, " Okay, if you want to move then you have to build me this house."
All the while thinking I have him now, there is no way that he will want to build that
giant house and he will give up. (Truly, it was a huge butt head moment in my life.)
He got this look on his face, like the sun just came up. " He looked at me and said, " really?
" this house?" " I said, yes, that house." but something was already starting to be in me
very afraid, as he jumped up and left the room. He came in the living room where I
was and handed me the house plans that He had already bought like 3 years previous.
They were the exact plans I had just spent the entire day thinking I had outsmarted
him and God. So we started building the house.
My job while he built the house was to sell our old one. I detest selling houses. I was
home schooling 5 but all six were 19,15, 12, 10, 8, 6 We painted the entire house ourselves,
we packed the house, and every time the Realtor called the kids knew how to get the house
ready to show. I begged God to sell it so I wouldn't have to show the house. I spent
so much time on my knees begging, yelling, and getting really mad at God. He always
said, No! I would give it over to Him, I would think that I was resting in Him and
really I think I was just storing up for a new fit.
Then September 10th came and I started a new Bible Study with the kids.
We were going to be studying Israel and the Minor Prophets. I knew there
was going to be a good possibility the timing was so God could show me how
much I was like the Israelites and how I was always wanting to return to Egypt.
The next morning, September 11, 2001 happened and I knew that God had
put me at the edge of the Red Sea and I was either going to have to trust Him
or I was going to sink and drown. No one wanted to buy a house. I was scared
out of my mind. The morning of September 11, my Dad was in Oklahoma in
the heart hospital having open heart surgery. It was such a tricky surgery,
he didn't know if he would survive and as I talked to him what might have
been for the last time, he was crying about the towers and the people.
Not about his surgery. It was such a long day.
So the house kept being built and my Dad was at home and the house
wasn't selling and we came to the biggest day of my life in my faith walk.
We had been out here meeting with someone, a carpet guy or someone.
The house we were living in at the time was a beautiful house to decorate
at Christmas. It was just beautiful. I had the prettiest banister and when
you came in it always was so pretty and it did have a beautiful vaulted ceiling.
Our move in date was December 7th. I am weird about dates and I kept
thinking about Pearl Harbor and I was really hoping God wasn't going to do
that too. I already was doing a pretty good job of wanting to forget the Red Sea
and was looking for a golden calf to dance around.
We came home and my husband built a fire in the wood stove. I went outside
to the side of the house where no one could hear me crying my heart out to God
about moving and no buyer and all of the things I was moaning and groaning about.
Then I remembered that I had not done my devotions for the day so I went in and
got my basket with my stuff in it and sat down. I got out my first one and this is
what I read. "`How long wilt thou mourn?... fill thy horn with oil, and go, I will
send thee... I have provided... ---1 Samuel 16:1
I was stunned. Only He knew that I was mourning and He told me that He had provided.
You also know that when oil is mentioned in the Bible, it is the Holy Spirit. So I knew
right away this was going to be all Him and nothing of me.
I knew it was time to stop being and acting like I was, so I began to choose to be happy
and Thankful for What God was going to do. I was really moaning just like Samuel had done
to God about Saul.
We moved in on December 7th. The following weekend we moved that last of our things
from the other house, I had cleaned it and my husband was over doing the last of the yard
work and some people stopped and wanted to see the house. He gave them a tour. They
said," We want this house. "He came home to this house and said," I think we have a buyer".
I had asked God if by Christmas Eve could I have a sale pending sign on our house.
We signed papers and by Christmas Eve I had my sale pending. One of my fears
was we would have to make two house payments. We never did, one closed and one
opened and nothing I was ever afraid of happened.
The lady that bought the house she went on the have six children too. The neighbors
think something is up with the house. :)
I feel like God used this part in my life to grow me up. You know how it says that
the Israelite wandered in the desert for 40 years? Well I think that was me.
I had spent the first 40 years wandering. He brought me back home and here I will
stay. He has continued to bring trials, but without that hard breaking He had to do
to grow me up in Him I might not have had the strength to withstand nor the faith
to trust Him in all things.
I have also learned that His ways are not my ways and His thoughts are not my
thoughts and His plans always work out. I can say, that I am so thankful
today for all that He has done and I am so glad that He never, never, never,
never, never left me. He is without a doubt a good God.
I just thought you might like to see the house that
I threw such a fit about and that God has blessed
me with and I am so thankful for and very humbled
that God lets me live here.
Oh, that men would give thanks to the Lord for His goodness, for His wonderful works to the children of men!(Psalm. 107:6)