Winter

Winter

Wednesday, October 28, 2009

Thoughts on Being a Mother-in-Law


When the kids first got married, one of the things that scared me to death was how do I stop being a Mother now and let my now adult children be all that God wants them to be? How do I stay out of their lives and let them live. I even joked I would write a book called " Hands off Parenting," Thankfully, when ever I am in doubt about what I should be doing, I can turn to Elisabeth Elliot and she has already trod the path that I am on. I found this little list and it has helped me so much. I know I have lapses and blow everything I am trying so hard to not do. But, God has given me the best of people to practice on and they are so wonderfully forgiving to me.
( Thank you)
So here is a really great list:

How to be a Good Mother-in-Law
1. Thank God for this acquired son or daughter. ( I do, I am so thankful for God's Gift to me.)
2. Treat this man and woman as adults with adult responsibility.
3. Remember your daughter or son now belongs to her or his spouse.
4. Allow them to form a new family---it's theirs, not yours-now
5. Expect it to be different from you and your family.
6. Let the newly formed family do things its own way.
7. Do not dish out gratuitous advice (Which is what I am doing now.)
8. Pray for them daily.
9. Never criticize the "in law" to his or her spouse ( I would add the rest of the members of the family or friends.)
10. Encourage them in every way you can think of.

I am and will always be learning and will hopefully get this better because I have 4 more chances to practice.

1 comment:

Meg said...

Aww, don't be so hard on yourself! I think you're doing great. :D

I like the list though, it's a very good one. I know number 3 must be pretty hard.