What I see now though was when God allowed the worst things I could have ever thought to happen to us, I can see how loving and kind God was now. When I felt like He only said, " Will you trust me," over and over, and I cried and said, " NO I Don't Trust You. I want you Lord to go away." He didn't, He has always promised, " To never leave me nor forsake me." He didn't.
I knew I was being a baby, but I was so angry at God, I could feel my heart growing hard. That was more scary to me than the trial.
Thank you, I know this is a long kind of post. Without your kind words and friendship, sometimes your words were such a lifeline. I thank you from the bottom of my heart.