
A year ago I was going through a trial that seemed like it
had gone on forever. A year later, I see how God used it
in my life and I can tell you, I am very, very thankful I am
here now and not where I was a year ago. I bet you thought
I was going to tell you how happy I was, I will tell you the truth.
I wasn't happy about it and I am afraid I bellyached and if I had
waited quietly it might have been over sooner.
But, I wrote this after I had made it through the other side. It ministers
to me. I know that there are so many of my friends in the midst of
much harder trials than anything I have ever encountered.
Today this is for you. I pray for you daily but God's Word is just
that and this is what I sort of learned.
Blessings to you.
Stuff I learned about Trials.

I don't know why I ponder stuff like I do but I do think
about trials and my response to them. I was reading in my
Streams of The Desert and it is one of the selections I love
because it amazes me.
"A bar of steel worth five dollars, when wrought into horseshoes,
is worth ten dollars. If made into needles, it is worth three
hundred and fifty dollars; if into penknife blades, it is worth
Thirty-two thousand dollars, into springs for watches it is worth
two hundred and fifty thousand dollars. What drilling the poor bar must undergo
to be worth this! But the more it is manipulated, the
more it is hammered, and passed through the fire, beaten and
pounded and polished, the greater the value.
May this parable help us to be silent, still, and long-suffering.
Those who suffer most are capable of yielding most; and it is
through pain that God is getting the most out of us, for His glory and the
blessing of others."
(selected)

Then today, as I was reading in John 11:1-6 It is the part of scripture that
talks about the letter Jesus receives from Mary and Martha. John wants us
to know that it is the Mary who anointed the feet of Jesus and used her hair
to wipe it away. The sisters tell their friend Jesus that the one that he loves is
sick.
I have always pondered why Jesus just didn't speak a word and heal Lazarus,
why didn't Jesus rush back and comfort the family. It says, that Jesus tarried
for two days longer, because He wanted God to be glorified and for God's
glory.
But today as I was reading it what jumped out at me was the simple phase,
in verse 5 Now Jesus loved Martha, and her sister, and Lazarus.
I kept thinking about it all day, Jesus loved them, John wants us to know
deep in our hearts, that this was love. Not that anyone did anything wrong,
not that someone was out of God's will, not because Jesus couldn't. It was
for the simple reason that they would all see the glory of God.

As I kept pondering the faith it takes to jump from waiting to trusting.
I know that Mary and Martha waited, as their brother got sicker and sicker
and then the moment when he died, I bet they felt unloved and forsaken
and very alone. I bet they doubted everything they had heard Jesus teach.
I bet the were angry too.
I think you see it when Mary remains sitting in the house, but Martha runs
to Him while He is still far off. It has been 4 very long days. I am sure there
are no more tears. I imagine they are exhausted from sorrow.
But still Jesus waits for Martha to reach out from the fiber of all that she believes
to trust Him. I think one of the most profound moments in scripture is when
Jesus says to move the stone, Martha does not want to trust Him, but He reminds
her of what He has just said, " Do you not want to see the glory of God?
Then He calls Lazarus.
Do you ever wonder about that scene, He must have had at least 100 pounds
of spices wrapped in the grave clothes. Was he sad to come back? Did he ever tell
his grand kids about the time he died and what it felt to come back?
Did he tell people what he saw?

I think so often my responses are like Martha's I want my own comfort, before I
want to see the glory of God. I want my life and those I love to have it easy and
trial free. But because God wants me to know that it is for my good and His glory,
He chooses to wait. I must have that place in my life to take that leap into trusting
and doing what He says, I must let Him open that tomb of my life, so I can
have a new life come out into the light of day.
I have been thinking about that and the more I read it over and over, I see
so many ways that Jesus still calls me Martha, Martha when I want my own
way instead of Mary who got the best part.
Just things I was thinking about and thought I would share them with
you. Have a great Tuesday!

Oh, that men would give thanks to the Lord for His goodness, for His wonderful works to the children of men!
(Psalm. 107:6)