July

July

Monday, September 9, 2013

Things I Wished I Had Known


I was going to start a second blog today. A private one for just my girls and the tasks they have taken on to educate their children at home. I couldn't come up with a name blogger liked so I will go ahead and write one for them. This is my disclaimer. You are welcome to read along, but I am sure most of it will come off opinionated and narrow minded. Even old fashioned. These are my own private views.

 Teaching by Example.

To My Girls,

First of all I want to thank you for sacrificing your time, energy and heath to choose to educate your children at home. For me, I am thankful because that means I didn't blow it so bad that I ruined your life. That you are doing what is one of the hardest jobs that will give you joy after joy when you reach my age. Looking back I am thankful that even though I thought in the beginning that home schoolers were just the weirdest bunch of people I had ever met. Then I became one. Then I fell in love with my kids and my home and my job. For a card carrying member of NOW that was saying a lot.  My goal in life, was never to be a wife or a mother and I certainly never meant to stay at home. So when I became a mother and then a few short years later decided to home school, I had no experience at all.


I had a great God who I believed and I trusted His promises that " He would never leave me nor forsake me." (Heb.13:5) I also believed Romans 8:28 in that since I believed He called me to this tasks and if I continually prayed, that He would take my mistakes and turn them around for good, just maybe I could do this thing for one year. I never thought I could do it for 25 years. I knew that I wouldn't ruin my kids if I tried it for one year.

When I started in the dark ages of home schooling. I was terrified. My extended family already thought I was a nut job but this was almost too much. I lived in fear that someone in my extended family would turn me in and my children would be taken away. So for 10 years, we hid in the house behind curtains. Never knowing who we could trust. I kept records of everything.

Because of that fear, I had to come up with a way of teaching. If by chance I was taken away, could or would my children know enough about life to continue on without me. What I found out is that discipline, is what you do when a rule is broke. Training the will is what you do when no one is looking. Training the will is harder and takes more time but the benefits far out way the work. When the kids get out of bed in the morning, have them make their own beds. Then when they are teenagers, you don't have that dirty room that lives in your house. But first, remember to lead by example, you can't expect them to make their bed every day if you don't. I think to remember home schooling means you will be the one they are watching and they will catch more things than you wish. They will learn your tone of voice, they will learn your weak points and know how to push them and they will know how to manipulate you to get you to give in to them.

Now that you are all grown and you sit around the dinner table and share the many ways you did this like buying T.V.s and hiding math books and other things, I know this to be true.
But love covers a multitude of sins and remember no matter what, you are raising the future. I kept having babies because of that saying that " The hand that rocks the cradle rules the world." Remember, Stalin and Hitler had mothers.  I knew I wasn't smart enough to come up with a cure for cancer or world peace. I knew that by raising great kids to be even greater adults, I could change the world. I am so proud of you all, you have far surpassed anything in my dreams and I am thankful God changed my life little by little and baby by baby. You have and are the fruit of my hands and now as mothers, I pass that baton off to you because I know, already you have done a better job than I ever dreamed.

I love you both and thank you for giving me grand children and for blessing my life. But most of all, for being my friends.

Mom

14 comments:

  1. i did not read this as i felt it may be too personal!!

    i have often thought about writing a letter to my younger self, with the same thought process!!

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  2. I, unlike Debbie above, read it even if it was personal.

    We need many more mothers like you. Good Job!!!

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  3. I think we can all learn a lesson from you. When you rise above the fear you can accomplish great things!!

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  4. From the heart...beautiful and meaningful words. xo

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  5. I read this. And then I almost cried because this has been a rough Monday morning. I have 4 kids, and the oldest is 7! We are entering our 3rd year of homeschooling, and it is a challenge to work with the older 2 while keeping the babies busy/not crying. Today was not the prettiest. But! We wouldn't trade it for anything else :) God is good. Thank you for these words of encouragement (for your family but I took some too!).

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  6. I didn't have time to read this until just now, after school. And today was a really rough day and all I could think was "can I really do this?? Should I just send them to school?" Thank you for this post. I really needed it and it was encouraging and a good reminder to teach by example. I love you!

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  7. I get so busy reading your posts, Kim, I have to go back and look at your photos. ~smile~
    Wow!! what a wonderful post and challenge for your girls, and I know you will reap the rewards of the example set forth to them by you these past 25 years. You will continue to reap many more rewards, as the baton has been taken and carried on. I know if I was a mom with school age children today I would home school them, I have so much admiration for those who make daily sacrifices to home school their children. So I am applauding you for your devotion to those years of teaching, and to those who are beginning. Your girls are blessed to have you to encourage them and tell them they too can make it, and that they too will reap many dividends of their investments.
    Hugs,
    Sue

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  8. Oh boy, this was just what I needed. I've kept on reading my books, and I feel like even if I don't quite understand how to put these concepts into practice, they help me be more patient and kind. The kids respond so much better to kindness.

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  9. A wonderful post full of good advice and wisdom gained from experience. Glad you shared it with all of us! I home-schooled some myself so I can relate to your fear and feelings of inadequacy. It seems you did an excellent job!

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  10. You are such a rock for your family Kim, and you obviously did a great job for 25 years. You did set a good example to your family and I hope that you will see the reaping of your hard work.
    Hugs,
    JB

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  11. What a treasure for these young mothers, a legacy well lived for them to follow. There is a lot of wisdom in these words Kim, and I'm pretty sure they will be the ones who reap the reward of your time, love, effort, and probably tears, but for sure the joy it has brought to all of you. You've done such a great job.

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  12. You are such a learner yourself. Ooops. I didn't make the bed this morning. I think teachers DO learn more than their students. It's a blessing.

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  13. What a blessing you are to your girls ... sharing the wisdom you acquired from your years "in the trenches".

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  14. What a beautiful post! Thank you for sharing it with the world!

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