I got a notice last night that a book I put on hold is in at the library. I am so excited. When I told the different members of my family they said " Oh good, can I read it?" What book you ask? Cuckoo's Calling by Robert Galbraith. Which is J.K. Rowling's pen name. I hope it is good. I expect to be waiting at the doors to the library when it opens. I also don't expect to get much sewing done.
Yesterday the boys came in at different times to tell me their schedules and the times they will be in and out of the house when school starts on August 26th. My stomach fell into my toes and I wish I could describe what it is, but I can't. Mostly I feel very, very afraid. Is this what empty nest feels like? The hours of loneliness that seem to be staring at me. I have to be very careful what I say because when I mention it to some friends they want me to jump into the ministries that they are involved in and are passionate about. Thinking about getting a job is in my thoughts as well. Going back to my Bible Study that I left when I started home schooling now is an option.
When I started home schooling 25 years ago, I didn't plan to home school that long. I never made a commitment longer than a year. I never could make long range plans because I wanted to do what God wanted me to do, so each year I would take time and I would pray and search my heart and He always led me for one more year. Then as I finished up in May the door closed and now I was in a brand new place I have never been before and now I wait.
Oh well I will continue on as I have before and look and wait and watch as this new part of life unfolds. Maybe I will just become a really good gardener and have perfect flowerbeds. Who knows but if it like anything else I will be surprised and I am sure it will be a lovely adventure.